Sunday, October 07, 2007

Beat the IVR

Remember the good old days, when you could call customer care and talk to a person who would resolve your problem? Neither do I. But I hear that a certain phone company in Bolivia actually has a customer care number with a humanoid being on the other end.

The rest of the world of course, talks to the best invention since elevator music. Press 1 to know what the invention is, press 2 to bomb Djibouti. Press 3 sensuously to turn me on.

You know what am talkin about....

And just when you learn to navigate through the myriad menus to reach a primate, those @$$#0|3s go ahead and change the entire thing. Those maternal copulating meanies!!! Their dream, a day when none of their customers bother them with a call, but shrivel under their desks (or kitchen counters) and quietly pay their bills.

We can't put up with this. To quote the greatest American president, Bill Pullman ( He kicked alien ass in ID4 dude!!)

"We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!"..

As a first bullet, I am giving below a secret map... the key... to reach an actual homo-sapien in Airtel Mobile customer care.

Please use it to the fullest. And spread the word around. And if you can get more such shortcuts to beat the shit out of these IVR systems.... I will gladly publish them and publicize them.

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